im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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