I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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