I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
ttyl tear gas
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
