The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize