so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize