Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Sober January is a disaster.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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