my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
We named our party play list daddy issues
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
