Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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