all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
So apparently I’m into choking now
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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