My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
