It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
