so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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