I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
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