I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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