Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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