Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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