i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
