I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
