Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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