She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
