You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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