I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
