Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize