Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Damn victory sex feels great
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
