I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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