He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
It's official drugs can't kill me
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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