I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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