I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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