C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
