Dual....:-)
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
my nose is crying tears of wow.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
