i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize