you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
