Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
