Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
So apparently I’m into choking now
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