Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
