why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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