I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
