I want to stick my p in your. b.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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