I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
