i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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