So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
where are you?
Hypothermia
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
