High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
