If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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