me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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