It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
