I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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