Hey man sorry I got all grabby
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
