he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
