i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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