Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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